The Eternal Lover

Eventually we realise that the longing within us for the lover of our dreams will never be fully realised. Each of us, if we are really honest, will admit we are unfulfilled in our relationship on some level. It may be just for moments here and there, but more commonly there are days, weeks and years when our lover shuts us out and avoids intimacy behind their busy responsibilities and any other number of often very valid excuses. People hide and disconnect. You do it, I do it. It’s all very understandable but lonely all the same. It does not take a lifetime to realise that intimacy is hard won and shifting.

So whether it is you who are avoiding intimacy or your partner, someone’s lonely. Loneliness is a big ache, and people resort to all manner of follies in an attempt to quench it’s gnawing bile. Alcohol, drugs, extra-marital encounters, model trains…None of which answers the need or makes peace with the loss we feel. 

How should we positively negotiate this dilemma? I have found consolation and strength by drawing to and comprehending, (perhaps only dimly), my Eternal Lover. I think we search for him in every relationship, then expect too much from people and find less than we need. 

It is said that our heavenly form is sexless, neither male nor female, not given in marriage. Sorry to break it to you, especially my Muslim brothers, but there’s no sex in heaven according to Jesus. In heaven, we will all be family, but more than that, we will be as true lovers, spiritually one and most intimate. No bible student can miss the multitude of references in the scriptures to God being our betrothed lover. Over and over God describes his feelings towards Israel as that of a wounded lover, rejected and betrayed. Everything started off all roses but Israel’s and the churches love grows cold. Many times God describes our unfaithfulness to be as an adulteress in our treatment of Him, our Eternal Lover. See the words of Hosea, Jeremiah, Ezekiel.

I believe in order to really discover God the Eternal Lover, one must finally, albeit reluctantly, come to identify the Eternal Whore within ourselves, guilty of base passions, foolish decisions and compromising graspings for provisions. Until we can stand before God and fully acknowledge this, we will never be able to grasp the fullness of His love. Remember His words to the prostitute who bathed His feet in tears, ” He who has been forgiven much loves much.” 

Few of us have ever experienced true forgiveness of this magnitude from an earthly lover, but it is always unendingly bestowed upon us by the Eternal Lover, the only one who fully and constantly loves us despite our whoredom. Some, who have learnt from Him, can forgive like Him, and there will be a day when we will all be fully accepted in the beloved AND by one another. Heaven will be that way and if fortunate, you may find glimpses of it here on earth.


Song of Songs, Chapter 1:1-4

I thought I would start this blog with thoughts from the Song of Songs,  a tale of supreme Erotic love, offering insight into all romantic love has to offer us. The Songs were written by King Solomon, the first living son of the infamous union between the giant slaying minstrel warrior King David and his lover, now wife, Bathsheba. 

King Solomon excelled even more that his father in virility, having over 1000 wives, but legend has it that he also had a passionate and soul filled affair with the Queen of Sheba who visited him, staying for more than 6 months. I believe the Songs were composed with the intentional use of clever hidden symbolism in order to particularly delight his like-minded Queen Sheba, who also aspired to the finding out of life’s riddles. It is stated that the Queen was very curious upon many matters and sought to test the wisdom of Solomon after hearing tales of his greatness. Apparently she was duly impressed and bore great reverence to the King. The songs are filled with all the fairytale idealism and intensity of Eros, but also, with great tenderness, expresses Agape within the erotic relationship.

The Song of Songs is also a parable that illustrates the nature of the Eternal Lover, Jesus Christ and his relationship with His people, as his betrothed bride. It has been a source of intimate symbolism of this most divine of all love relationships.



 v1 This is Solomon’s song of songs, more wonderful than any other.

Far from being an arrogant boast, this introduction is meant to tell the reader, “Listen to these mysteries and give them your careful attention. It will lead you to knowledge and experiences, “More wonderful than any other.”

v2 “Kiss me with the kisses of your mouth, for your love is so much better than wine.”

The song starts with the dark and exotic beauty longing to be kissed. She’s putting out, and desiring his affection. One is led to believe, in this tale, the woman is the initiator.

v3 “Your anointing oil smells good, and your name is like purified oil, hence many women love you.”

Romantic love (Eros) is experienced through the senses, but the woman is also revealing the first blossomings of admiration and an elevation of the beloved. Erotic love is idealistic and so it should be. These early feelings of idolation and respect will later become strengthened by Agape in a good healthy relationship. At this stage she realizes that she is one of many, as the king has not yet chosen her.

v4 “Lead me and I will run behind you. The King has brought me into his private inner room. We will exult with trembling and rejoice. We will document this love as a memorial, for your love is better than wine. It is right that I love you.”

The woman is naturally inclined to submission in the presence of her chosen beloved. She wants to be led and to follow as an expression of her respect for him. This is the most beautiful thing a woman can bestow upon a man and his perception of it leads him to choose her and to desire intimacy with her within the “inner chamber” of his heart. The couple then find themselves in an electric situation where they both realize they have a love of worth that should be immortalized (as it was in this poem). There is a deep feeling of rightness about it all.